Making Everyday a Special Occasion
Special occasions rarely come around – otherwise, they wouldn’t be special. It is the rarity of these occasions that makes us cherish them, but also what should inspire us to make more of them.
This story originally appeared on the Gents Cafe Newsletter. You can subscribe here.
In this economy, personal investments come at some extra cost: the care we diligently owe to worthy items, a cashmere jumper, a silvered candelabra, a bespoke shirt, some made-to-order shoes, or whatever else it might be. “Let’s save it for a special occasion”, so we say. The expression is a familiar one, one we use a lot of the time. And, to be honest, I think it’s wrong.
Why put on my special stuff just for a casual weekend? I believe this mentality is mistaken, and yet I struggle with it myself. I bought a cashmere roll-neck from Luca Faloni a couple of months ago, and it’s divinely gorgeous and exquisite – I’m glad I bought it. Yet, I still haven’t managed to bring myself to wear it, not least because of the lack of frosty days but mainly for the fear of staining its ivory-white purity on an occasion that didn’t feel quite worth it to begin with, as the pain for such an inconvenience would be intensified. I also commissioned a bespoke shirt from Cad & The Dandy, which I love but have hardly worn – few times at most. Just recently, I caught up with Mattia (the tailor from Cad who made it) who has one himself and told me to wear and iron it like hell to make it look how it should. He’s right.
The ‘saving for a special occasion’ mindset is wrong, and there is some explanation as to why. Many will be aware of the viral etiquette consultant William Hanson, whom I’m glad to call a friend. William once remarked on his podcast that this attitude is actually a difference in class. As the line goes: the aristocracy doesn’t buy their art, they inherit it. Similarly, the aristocracy always have furniture that’s not immaculate, or silverware not fully gleaming like in its heyday; cup rings, scratches, and whatnot, it’s there – and it’s no problem. Beautiful pieces, whatever they are, are meant to be used and used thoroughly and properly, and simply maintained along the way.
Special occasions rarely come around – otherwise they wouldn’t be special. It is the rarity of these occasions that makes us cherish them, but also what should inspire us to make more of them. Special happenings occur, but they can also be made, and we should be making more of them. If one was to commend any nugget of wisdom, it would simply be to wear that expensive cashmere, use the special silverware or candle, and make special occasions when none are yet forthcoming.
